Campaign of the Month: May 2016


Sacred Relics of Ankeshel


Zachariah Woundwort was, like his brother, Malachai, an influential Steam Drake in the city of Harkesh. However, unlike his brother, he was not warlike, and held no position in the city guard. Rather, he was considered somewhat as a sage. With his SEKBAN contingency of dragon-blooded humans, and his literate JAMBUKA slaves, he spent much time investigating the history of his land, listening intently to his human servants as they turned the pages of ancient texts and read out the stories and recollections held within those sacred tomes.

Long before the time of Mharot, these lands were populated by empires of free peoples – Caelmarans, Minotaurs; before that Ankeshelians, even Elves. Although many of these were powerful, wielding great magic and mighty weapons, their most potent power, in Zachariah’s opinion, was LITERATURE. The great ability to write and record. And in his brief life, Zachariah had made himself a master of this knowledge.

Human pages were difficult for him to turn, so he employed many servants and slaves to read, and many also to scribe. Even the great TIMARLI and URMANLI would come to Zachariah for information, and THEY would pay handsomely.

Recently Zachariah had stumbled on some scrolls from the time of the Minotaur civilization in the province of Mezar, and in particular, a great fortress in the Dragoncoil Mountains, and indeed of an ancient guarded library, wherein were kept THE BIBLIOTHECA OF ANKESHEL, three magical tomes from the ancient island of Ankesh. These he must have! But he dare not alert any of the great powers, particularly the undead MORZA, Ibbalan the Illustrious. Indeed, great stealth was needed. Indeed, brave JAMBUKA, possibly even KOBALDI were needed. For what drake could fit into the tiny passages devled by the delicate tools of these ancient humanoids?

And so, Zachariah had come to his brother, Malachai, with a proposal to find, excavate and extract these fabled gems of arcana, these glowing jewels of Mysteria. Surely, Zachariah must know a group that could serve the purpose of this noble brotherhood….

JAMBUKA – lowest ranks, unscaled races,
KOBALDI – kobolds,
SEKBAN – low ranking dragonkin, dragon-blooded humans,
EDJET – dragonkin swordmasters and elementalist wizards,
AKINJI – high ranking dragonkin and a few lesser drakes,
TIMARLI – minor nobles, mainly dragons, drakes or wyverns,
URMANLI – true dragons,
MORZA – supreme dragon rulers whose opinions weigh heavily on the Sultan.

The Final Countdown
Death Trap avoided and Magical Tome delivered


Having vanquished a ravenous slime ooze, Teenage Rampage set about overcoming the Death Trap, a pit trap to the underground, activated by opening the door on the far side of the 5 foot square corridor.

Jack of Badside Row, enlarged by Spinwind, held Squeek Squaker out at arm’s length to open the door and de-activate the trap. The kobold felt proud to declare his success, but none dared to step on that floor. Instead, Jack threw the unwilling kobaldi into the room, where he was immediately attacked by a Clockwork Huntsman hidden behind the wall. The next attack immobilised the kobold and he was knocked unconscious.

Jack jumped in and avoided a second net. Next came the mighty leap of Sni Ve-Lor, followed by a telporting Spinwind. Finally Gangwulf made the leap of faith and the crew fought the clockwork creature to it’s demise, with Sni Ve-lor delivering the fatal blow that killed the creature, exploding it in a powerful eruption of steam and deadly metal, unfortunately killing Squeek.

After a brief tussle over the book, with Spinwind finding it hard to fight his insane urge for personal possession, the tome was finally put safely into the bag of holding. A few other magical wizardly items were found and taken, and the group managed to leave the Cold Cellars and the ancient home of Leviticus Margase without any further trouble.

On presentation of the book, Krispy Dacon was able to give the party a good deal on a “Raise Dead” and the party still received 7000 GP of their promised reward.

Time to rest and take stock of the situation for a few weeks!

Dungeon of Leviticus Margase


After the bright light of Divine Intervention, Teenage Rampage now descended into the slippery wet darkness of endless stairs leading down. Three ropes used as guides on the way down, secured at the top Iron Door, and tied together. Opening the bottom Iron Door, the group encountered and defeated a ravenous slime ooze. Now ready to try and overcome a DEATH TRAP, the group prepare to enter the final stage of the dungeon!

The reach of Thoth-Hermes


Who can tell how time operates in the realms of the Gods? Mere mortals can only surmise, but do the denizens of those planes even understand their own relationship with the prime material plane? AMON-HEN, Planetar of THOTH-HERMES had contemplated these ideas before, and would again. He watched over many places, knew many faces, and yet his interactions with living mortals were rare.

Now he was being commanded by his Lord to attend to a place in underground Harkesh. A lowly human sniper had called out in desperation, and THOTH-HERMES, Master of Arcane Realms, Patron of Scholars and Thieves, had listened. AMON-HEN would intervene on his behalf, and, gethering the power from the plane around him, he sent his avatar forth.

AMON-HEN descended into the collapsed underground gardens of the once noble sage, Leviticus Margase, now long gone, with his home squashed under the very weight of the earth. In the remains of the great entrance lobby Sni Ve-Lor stood defiantly against hordes of skeletons, tracing the sign of a circle and a crook in the air – the symbols of THOTH-HERMES. There seemed to be no hope in the ashen faces of his companions, Gangwulf, Jack of Badside Row, Squeek Squaker and Spinwind, as they fell to the overpowering numbers of the undead.

But these undead powers were as dust to AMON-HEN, and in a blaze of glory, light, and positive energy he raised his arms with the power of his Lord, and vanquished the splintering bones of skeletal remains into the void.

AMON-HEN smiled at the group of adventurers before he faded back into his own realm. So THIS was Teenage Rampage. Catchy name, he thought. So very apt.

And the room was silent.

Dear Diary...
The private accounts of two women from the Triolan Quarter


I wonder what secrets might be lurking in the diaries of Millie Vanillie and Babe. Let’s have a look and see….


“Yesterday was such a wonderful day. I took Jack and his pals to the Imperial Gardens. It was a beautiful day, and in a rare private moment, Jack gave me a bracelet. It must be worth a fortune. I don’t know how a teenager from Badside Row could have the money to buy such things. And he is always dressed so well when he visits The Black Nurian.

Jack is rather sweet. But we haven’t yet had a NIGHT OF TOTAL PLEASURE. I wonder when he will ask. Maybe it’s because of my working hours. I DO work a lot, but it doesn’t pay well, and I have a rented house to maintain.

He is strong and powerful, yet not rough, I imagine. At least, I’ve never seen him being rough. I wonder what he is like on those adventures he goes on. It would be nice to get to know him better, but I don’t think I could live in a house with that Sni Ve-lor!"


“Oooh! It was the FIVE KOBOLD DEBATE yesterday. I’ve been looking forward to it for ages. I love them little kobaldi and their wise ways. I was so excited by the event that I felt myself getting a little hot under the panties. Luckily for me, there was quite a sexy young man – a bit dirty, but just the way I like them, and it seemed like he’s got some money too. I made an arrangement to meet him at The Cockle and Clam.

Sni Ve-lor was in a group meeting with his friends, but when I popped up, he left the meeting to come and see me. So romantic! I got all hot and flustered again, and we ended up going to his place for the night. After a few energetic hours, I thought, this could be the kind of man I could go for. Maybe I could even get out of the “skin” industry and set up a home with a man like this. We shall have to wait and see."

Come tiptoe, through the mushrooms, with mee-eeee
Terrors of the Cold Cellars

An excerpt from ‘A kobolds guide to not adventuring’ – by Squeek Squaker

Note: ((Anything in double brackets is what actually occurred, as opposed to the heroic reimagining of Squeek))

Yes my beloved readers the current state of affairs where dark indeed, only to get more dire! As covered in the previous chapter; I had fallen for an ancient and deadly stair fall trap, fallen pray to the greed and lust for power of others and been beset by ancient and terrible corrupted drakes! ((Squeek (already in a state of near hyperventilation upon entering the cold cellars again) fell down some 80ft of stairs when he jumped out his skin and lost his footing after Jack of Badside Row put a reassuring hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. Causing him to scream, screech and blubber all the way down and while being healed by Gangwulf from the near fatal injuries this caused. From here on out much begging to abandon the quest and go home commenced. The “ terrible corrupted drakes” were in-fact quite small and cute, which of course he ran screaming from!))

It took us many treacherous hours to reach the bottom of that terrible tomb ((about two or so)) and more still to get through the perilous enchanted gates guarding the entrance of our quarry! ((Five or so minutes of physically hauling on the stuck gate, wasn’t even locked, how nice)) Then began the journey through the perilous underground forest of venomous purples and pink coloured plants with a sky filled with toxic luminous spores on the roof and vile undead drakes. ((A rather pleasant half hour stroll through some rather fantastic psychedelic coloured gardens and assorted tastefully placed trees, with some pesky little Jaculi and stunning twinkling bio luminescent shrooms above)).

Shortly after passing unflinchingly through these Dragon given trials ((more crying and begging to go home)) may they live for all eternity, we came across a field of mushrooms and a stone bridge crossing a raging torrenting river (a pleasant river with moderate current).

But dear readers, so MANY mushrooms. So plump and delectable looking I remember them vividly to this day. However, as I always advise, caution first. The brave Jack threw a rock at a clump to ensure nothing untoward would occur when moving close, crushing them to harmless pulp. Feeling reassured he forged ahead accidentally stomping on another clump hanging over the path. Suddenly lumbering into view was a horrifying mushroom man, a Deathcap Myconid protector of mushroom fields. These beasts, although delicious, (see ‘A kobaldi’s guide to things that want to eat you and how to eat them first’’ pg 29, for cooking prep and instruction) are highly toxic and poisonous. It’s eyes filled with rage and hatred pointed at Jack’s, still shroom covered, foot saying ‘Who Talk?’ Poor jack could only stammer incoherently, taking this as a sign of hostility Sni Ve-Lor (or perhaps just hungry) shot at the creature, missing.
Jack not missing a beat charged, swinging and causing a plume of sleep spore to release, putting him to sleep. Seeing the danger Gangwulf also charged and Spinwind began a devious summoning. A giant horse appeared and began running riot among an mushrooms in an attempt to distract the shroom man, and it worked. The beast slunk away, allowing us to bravely push onwards!

Before us now lay the entrance of the terrible mage abode of ‘Leviticus Margase’, his name inscribed arrogantly above the doors before us. There was a vote to leave this cursed place, that I resolutely rejected! ((Squeek again begging to abandon the quest and go home))

The room that greeted us beyond was a large entry chamber, a foul stench permeating the air, everything covered in thick layer of grime. An ominous pressure trying to force us back. Looming out the darkness came a terrible presence, a Darakhul Ogre. It wreaked bloody vengeance upon our unsuspecting party. Putting poor Gangwulf to the ground with paralysis and Jack almost to the grave. To make matters worse a swarm of vicious bats appeared and a Cackling bird like woman thing. However we proved victorious in the end, hammering into the ghoul till it vanished in a cloud of magic and burning the bats with alchemical fire. The bird thing fled after seeing its minions eradicated. Battered and exhausted we gathered to discus out next move, did we rest or push ever onwards?

Scrolling Down to The Garden
Deep into the cold cellars...


Teenage Rampage were on the move again. Deep into the Cold Cellars beneath the Old Scriptorium, flaunting a new Bag of Holding and 10 flasks of Holy Water. Jeez, are these guys religious or what?

Squeek Squaker led the way with a near fatal trip at the top of the stairs. (Thank AZURAN OF THE WEST WIND for secondary Reflex Saves! ) Jack of Badside Row was not taking off his armour for anybody, so BOY, did Geddy Lee‘s silk rope come in handy! Spinwind put his foot through a rotten stair as well. So, after a lot of stair tumbling, and with some very LOUD noise, Gangwulf had some healing to do. Sni Ve-Lor didn’t even USE the stairs, electing instead to shimmy down the side of the wall with his daggers sticking out of the holes that used to hold the supports of the now missing handrail. Jeez, does nothing last these days?

When Jack discovered a hidden passage to a library, Spinwind became like a child in a sweet factory. When he saw the magical scrolls lying on the table he went positively nuts! Oh, how he loved to cast “READ MAGIC”, that boy! But the old spell gave no warning of the EXPLOSIVE RUNES on the third scroll, did they? Luckily, Gangwulf was kept busy keeping everyone alive again, and the gang decided to go down even further, finding an old wrought iron gate leading onto a weird pink and purple landscape of short grass, shrubs and strange trees.

Opening the gates, they entered into an underground cavern lit by magical star-like spores high up in the ceiling above. Gangwulf heard a couple of animal cries but nobody else did. They decided to investigate one of the trees, and out of nowhere, two Jaculi attacked from above, knocking out Jack and taking the only UNREAD SCROLL from the Bag of Holding.

The two small dragonettes hurriedly fled back into the sanctuary of their tree. Their camouflage was second to none, but the eagle eye of super sniper Sni Ve-lor found its mark on one of them. Alas, these brutes were hardier than they at first seemed. An angry Teenage Rampage burned down the tree with Alchemist Fire, but not a sign of the buggers! And Spinwind squealed in utter desperation at the thought of the stolen scroll.

At least there seemed to be a path through the garden, And Squeek, who was the only one that could see all the way across the garden, had told them they were about to approach a bridge over a stream.

A Nightmare on Thelma Street
Crooktail's Miscalculation


Crooktail, Kobaldi Cleric of AZURAN OF THE EAST WIND, made his decision. They would attack this mischievously “big-spending” group of Jambuka and their flag bearing Kobaldi leader. With no Dragonkin guards appearing for at least 15 minutes, it was worth the risk. The group had been “sized up nicely” on their way to the pub, and they had some pretty good quality gear. With a bit of luck, his crack archers would down a couple immediately, and the rest would scarper! He gave the silent order.

The first hit did not score a kill, but a serious wound on their wizard would help. The Silverscale brothers, Grimey and Slimey had fired the first shots and would be ready to take the initial attack, with the two hidden rogues, Eggrunner and Snaretoe, ready to make flanking attacks. Crooktail reckoned if he had to lose a couple of rogues, it would still be worth the venture, but just in case things got worse, he had his escape route at the ready.

With his favourite archers, Gary and Barry Gearcobble directly in front of him, he gave the “silent squeeze” for them to loose their missiles, and cast HOLD PERSON on their ENLARGED fighter. Now they counter attacked. Their sniper was good, but at least the fighter had been held, and oh shit! He hadn’t realised that kobold was a bard. Things were beginning to look difficult. Eggrunner went down. Ah no, not GREASE! Damn their wizard, and curse that Cleric of Seggotan for keeping the others alive! Looks like this wasn’t turning out to be the walk in the park Crooktail had been hoping for. He rushed forward to CAUSE FEAR on the bard, but alas, the slimy kobold resisted. Slimey went down. And Grimey!

“Run Away!” Crooktail yelled, as he speedily exited to the south. One of his rogues managed to follow, and his two archers. Oh, what a miscalculation. “TEENAGE RAMPAGE Indeed!” What a disaster!

Dreams of Freedom...
Congruent Adventure Log by stigandr


The final prisoner, Thelem the Dragon-blooded, last beaten and bloodied survivor of his adventuring band, lay bound to the table, manacles on his wrists and ankles, a rag stuffed in his mouth, for his captors did not want answers… They did not need answers. This was about cruelty and terror.

Three of his captors stood around him, a jet-skinned southerner that leaned upon the massive hammer that had broken Thelem’s shield-arm through both his armour and his family shield. The same hammer that had crushed the skull of his beloved younger brother Thelis… Oh, were that Thelem was free and armed! He would have some measure of revenge!

The hooded figure, a person of the Ruby Sea, no mistake from his accent, and one that seemed to revel in the inflicting of pain had murdered his other wounded comrades, he seemed giddy with the pleasure of taking life. Laughing as he counted the coin taken from the bodies of his comrades, he had discarded anything that wasn’t gold or better.

The third, a westerner, strangely was wearing a turban, seemed to be in charge. His eyes glowed with arcane magic even in the shadows and unlike the others he seemed to have a purpose beyond the mere killing of his group… Perhaps if Thelem could appeal to this?

He had disintegrated the bodies of his brother and his comrades with an evil purple ray and a magic beyond any of them, ‘getting rid of any evidence’ was how he described it. But now he stood before Thelem and with a cold sneering voice, he lifted Thelem’s chin up as he addressed his comrades to look straight into Thelem’s terrified eyes.

“Why does every group of adventurers in this shit-hole seek to betray you and have a fucking dragon-blood leading them?”

There was a pause, perhaps he was searching for Thelem’s final look of defiance? He got it.

“Because you dragon-bastards can’t be trusted. Least of all in this toilet of a city.”

The jet-skinned Southerner spoke, “Last night there was a group sought to talk to me, novices by the look of them, but humans if that serves better? I told them to approach you at the stall…”

The arcane westerner stood back, looked thoughtful, he sighed, “No dragon-kin?”

“Four humans. They approached me apart from their one kobaldi comrade… a bard at that. One of the humans wore a hidden symbol of Lada. They asked about the lands beyond the city. ”

There seemed to be some smirk in his voice, almost like the fact that the kobold was a bard was funny. The hooded figure also laughed, the westerner looked even more annoyed at this.

“They will have to do. If you meet them be as pleasant as you can manage. They may be more inclined to our allegiances.”

The human then returned his attention to Thelem, he looked contemptuous. The last words Thelem heard before a purple light unmade him were “You did not know you were betraying me, but betray me you did. And for that, you die!”

Five Gears
"Pushing through the market square..."


After a slow morning with fresh bread baked by Mandla and a letter and reward sent by Kobaldi Kirby for the rescuing of his daughter’s Tiara, TEENAGE RAMPAGE set out for the Triolan Market Square to experience the much anticipated FIVE KOBOLD DEBATE.

After hearing several edfying speeches about the major Draconic religions of the Mharoti Empire, a public vote was held and Izmos Steelcoat declared the winner for his eloquent religious assessment of the tenets of Azuran of the West Wind.

Thereafter, much rejoicing was held in the square; and when Squeek Squaker, Jack of Badside Row, Sni Ve-Lor and Gangwulf went home for dinner, they met up with Spinwind, who suggested they go out for a few “JARS” at The Black Nurian. They passed a couple of suspicious kobolds en route, and returning back the same way later that evening, were alarmed when two bolts zipped out of the darkness, severely wounding poor Spinwind!

Combat Starts Next Week!